All of these issues are simply stalking horses for generational change - for a struggle of the young, with their vision of a pluralistic, independent and progressive New Zealand, and the old, too many of whom look back nostalgiacly to the "good old days" of the fifties, when Pakeha were unquestionably dominant and secure in their identity as British, and women and Maori knew their place. The problem for the old is that they are dying; History (or rather demographics) is on our side, and we will bury them - literally, in most cases.
I agree - most New Zealanders under about 35 (I fall into neither category, BTW) will have been brought up with a multi-cultural viewpoint on society. It is interesting in this context that "Choosing a Maori name for your baby" is a sufficiently mainstream book to be sold at the Auckland Airport bookshop (I suppose it could be being bought by outgoing tourists - so we'll get a whole bunch of little Tane Schmidts and Hinemoa Yashimotos).
I think Don Brash is part of the last gasp of the grumpy 50+ generation - in ten years or so they probably won't come near having the numbers to try and push NZ back into an anglocentric nuclear family mould.